Someone Is Asking Really Dumb Questions

Question: Should women get paid menstrual leave from work?

Did y’all see this in the news recently? Here’s one article on it.

I’m not sure why this is a question. It should be a statement. Who is asking this stupid question anyways? Definitely not a women and not my dogs. Shouldn’t this be a ‘Public Safety Announcement’? Not only should we get paid leave from our place of employment we should get respite care away from our home employment, including partners and children. Far away. Different postal/zip code.

Definition: Respite care is the provision of short-term accommodation in a facility outside the home in which a loved one may be placed. This provides temporary relief to those who are caring for family members, who might otherwise require permanent placement in a facility outside the home.

I’d like to qualify for permanent placement outside the home. Just kidding. Maybe. Of course the Respite Care facility should be tweaked too accommodate the circumstances. The facility requires no men, no children. It can’t even smell like a man has been there. Ever. The facility must have freshly made cheesecake daily, butter tarts, strawberries dipped in chocolate, any smoothie we could ever want with chocolate on the side, tea, lattes. The facility must have huge, comfy pillows in the home movie theatre with salty, buttery popcorn readily available. Real butter. Don’t even think about anything but real butter. Remember why I’m there. No casualties. There needs to be endless supply of movies to choose from, comedy’s and romance, like BrideMaids, Sweet November, Hope Floats etc. and a few documentaries that can channel our frustrations. Movies about Monsanto usually fire me up pretty good. Haha! (Oh yes I will blog about Monsanto).

Imagine the difference in our life if everyone just got lost for a day or two. Preferably two. Wow. How much more tolerable PMS could be. If I’m realistic and pin point what annoys me the most during my PMS time frame, it’s people. Basically anyone who breathes.

PMS is not funny. I seriously cough up a week of my life every month. That equates to 3 months of every year I lose. What a rip off!! I’m irritable, murderous, zero tolerance for people even breathing, never mind chewing their food or slurping soup that’s for dinner. Thursday I made homemade chicken soup for dinner and the hubby slurps his soup (times like this I’d like to have not so nice words with his mother!!) I grabbed my bowl as I get ready to leave the table and was so incredibly annoyed I snapped at him (I swear I saw a bit of fire leave this dragons mouth) ‘you are disrespecting my soup when you slurp it. SOUP DOESN’T WANT TO BE SLURPED!!’ Oh ya, I’m loads of fun. Of course I try and wrangle it in and keep it under control, but there is always a casualty, despite my honest efforts.

Side Note: Future prospects for my son – he does not slurp his soup because his mother has told him she does not need his partner to want to have not-nice-words with me! Yes, You can thank me later.

So I sit in my doctors office a few months ago. I tell him you need to help me. I explain that someone is going to lose a limb, at the very least. He was amazing. He said it is hard for sure and as we approach menopause it can get worse or better. For me it’s getting worse. I don’t need anyone’s vote on that. I know my own reality. Definitely. So he suggested I take some Evening Primrose. If that doesn’t take the edge off he can help with hormones. Pffft. No hormones. Isn’t that what is causing the issues now? I definitely don’t need to feed the dragon. I take my Evening Primrose regularly but I can tell you my edges are still very sharp. I should come with a warning ‘Handle With Care’ or you’ll get cut! Deep. Stitches. Prosthetics.

I can’t help but wonder (often) what society would be like if men PMS’d and cramped up while they shed their uterus lining. It wouldn’t be a question of whether men get paid menstrual leave, it would of been implied from day one. Ever witness a man cold? How about a male who has a man cold and PMS? Can you frigging imagine? I would take hubby out back and shoot him in the field like the rabid beast he would be, to put me out of my misery. Oops!! I mean put him out of his misery. Reality is, men couldn’t handle PMS. Truth.

I am a lucky one. Or maybe it is any co-workers I would have, that are the lucky ones. I work from home and can take 1/2 day or full day off when I feel it’s a  public safety issue. It’s not often that I feel a need to take a whole day off due to PMS. Lucky right? Very! Let me remind you why. No one is around to annoy me with their unnecessary breathing. I work alone.

As we continue to fight for equality in the work place, I don’t see paid menstrual leave working in our favour. Yet. It’s a long way out there for sure and if it comes around I probably won’t care. I’ll either be in jail or through lovely menopause and life will be glorious again.

I wish for my sisters out there a supportive partner and some relief in any form you can get it. Take what you need, even a day off work, you deserve it!

Thank you for reading!! I’m off to find butter tarts 😉


2 thoughts on “Someone Is Asking Really Dumb Questions

  1. Paid leave for PMS? Bahahahaha! Sorry, but that is so funny and would cost companies a huge amount of money. It will never …ever…ever happen. Don’t get me wrong, I hate PMS, so do the people I live with. They don’t like me much either when I go through it, and who can blame them? I’m like something that has come visiting from Hell. I even apologize before hand cause I know that its coming. “RUN FOR THE HILLS!” lol.

    Liked by 1 person

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