I’m writing in a fog with a major headache, so I can’t be held responsible for the words that come off my fingers😁
Yesterday was a day of juicing but with a farewell latte for breakfast. I certainly can’t expect to call that day 1. I’m looking at yesterday as the prep for the bigger challenge and I expect to play by the rules and accept today as my Day 1 of juicing, not yesterday.
After weighing the pros and cons and getting some feed back, I bought a scale yesterday. After Flyp & Einstein goofed around like kids with a new toy, the scale has been placed upstairs in my bathroom for regular weigh ins. I figure I’ll weigh myself in the am and pm. I stood on the scale this morning. It’s not a pretty picture, but it’s not a horror show either. My goals are totally attainable and I will continue to work towards them.
Yesterday while working at the food bank, I got hungry. I had only had a ‘juice’ before I left and that was breakfast. By the time I got home after grocery shopping and volunteering it was 7pm. I WAS HUNGRY!! I stayed true to the program and made a mother of a juice and had 2 big glasses of juice. Next week, I’m taking a ‘juice’ with me when I go in for my shift. It can be very physical at the food bank and it’s easy to work up an appetite, especially when you have only juiced for meals.
I’ve been juicing twice a day for a week and eating a balanced dinner each day, until yesterday. I think my food awareness is heightened in the last week. I’m so aware of what people are eating, their choices and I can almost identify the foods I can’t see by their smell. Everywhere I look food is being advertised. It’s astounding and it’s a killer!! It definitely has the ability to make you crack under the constant reminder of delicious food everywhere. We definitely are a fast food nation and are always looking for convenience to our busy lives. What ever you do if you ever do this juicing thing, stay off pinterests food board!!
While I was at the grocery store yesterday I found myself examining peoples cart items. Weird eh? Ya I thought so too. Well that was totally me yesterday. Then I would look at the person and decide if the contents suited that person. Working mom with 2 children, some produce, a lot of pre made or pre cut (like frozen vegetable stir fry type foods, frozen french fries etc.) in her cart. A plus size woman with a very cute baby, I didn’t see any fresh produce, but a lot of pop, pre-made and boxed foods and don’t forget the diapers. A young couple with nachos, cheese, salsa other chips, and pop and a few other random items. They weren’t overly chubby, but not fit either. 100% of the time the items made perfect sense in relation to the persons with the cart. If you looked at mine, full of juicing produce and then looked at me, for now, I would of been my own exception. I could smell the rotisserie chicken and the food from the hot counter. I could smell the bread as I walked past the fresh crisp delicious bread section. I felt like I had a gun to my head and if I even turned slightly to look the bullet was going to take me down.
Oddly enough I noticed, for the first time, that the produce section is smaller than the boxed, prepared section in the grocery store. A lot smaller actually. Still a big section, but nothing compared to the freezers that are required to hold all the pre made foods, the isles full of canned and prepared food. I then took my memory to the other stores that I sometimes shop at and the same prognosis; the produce section is substantially smaller than the remainder of the store.
On my drive home I thought of places like Italy. Market visits are daily and it’s all fresh produce, fresh foods and local community support. I lose my shit when I see garlic from China in a store when we have some of the best garlic growers in Canada, right here in our backyard, Ontario. Being industrialized has not done us any favours, that I have always known.
While I was in the lineup at the grocery store I saw some pretty unhealthy people with some very unhealthy choices. I kept telling myself to STOP thinking. Then I continued to wonder if they had any health concerns that they were aware of. Do they just ignore them? Or are they like me and waiting for the obvious to blind side them?
When I got home I couldn’t unpack quick enough and juice me something to nurish myself. I threw in kale, spinach, carrots, lemon, pineapple and green apples. I had 2 huge glasses. I was starving. Einstein even had one and half glasses and drank it willingly and said it was good. But then he proceeded to make his lunch and eat half of it while making it. Haha!
I was a bit bitter or tainted, maybe frustrated last night. When I got home I was sore from the work at the food bank and very hungry. I complained to Einstein while I was juicing my produce.
– I know a lot of people who are way more over weight and claim to have no serious health issues. How is this fair?
– People who smoke and drink seem to be trucking along just fine. How is this fair? I don’t smoke or drink. Ever.
– People who eat fast food often and prepared foods more aren’t dealing with diabetes etc.
Why is it I’m stuck with this bullshit. Of course I dropped the F bomb every other word and I was totally raunchy and crunchy all while fighting tears. He doesn’t get to hear me wallow in my own shit very often so he was a bit taken back. He also knows he’s included in one of the lists from above. He eats like he is a teenager and I’m constantly reminding him he will have a big consequence coming his way one day. I try not to harp, but if I’m honest I get on him pretty good, he loves fast food and it really pisses me off that he is very privileged to eat my cooking with organic meats and box-free ingredients. He’s getting better as more and more he would come home to an empty table for dinner with a note at his spot; Pizza is down the road. Eventually he can take a hint, after I smash him over the head with it.
He was kind and gentle in his response, as usual. He said ‘this isn’t like you, drink up.’
I did. Then he said ‘things happen for a variety of reasons’, as he filled up my glass for round 2.
‘You’re the matriarch of our family and maybe Josh and I will be healthier because your strength and determination really does inspires us.’
Hmmmm, not sure I buy that but ok. I felt more human-like with 2 glasses of juice in me and went for a walk with the dogs to try and shake off the grumpies.
Today I wake to the smell of Flyp, our teenager who is always up before the sun, making maple syrup sausages and eggs for breakfast. Pretty sure I wanted to shoot someone right in the face after I kicked them in the face. That’s the stomach talking, not me. I normally wouldn’t smell or even notice it before but today I swear I am canine like in my senses and I could taste each ingredient through the smell. I obviously can’t get angry at them for eating, but it would be so much easier if they didn’t. Lol.
My head is pounding but I’m determined to ride this out. I’m actually very tired and feel lethargic. I think I might feel like I have a hang over. I haven’t been hung over since I was a teenager. My stomach is making the most odd noises that I wonder if it is calling E.T.
My understanding is the headaches, tiredness and BLAH moodiness is part of the detox that will be at its worst for 3 days. Hopefully by Monday it will give me a bit of a break. I’m counting on it because feeling like a bag of shit for consuming healthy foods won’t make sense for long 😞
Morning Juice – kale*, spinach*, carrots*, tomatoes*, green apples*, pineapple, lemon